The author read this audiobook, one of the more engaging and beautiful audiobooks I have enjoyed recently. Hua Hsu is a Taiwanese American born in 1977. He won a Pulitzer for this book written in 2022, which focuses on his college years in the 1990s and particularly on his friendship with a Japanese American named Ken, who was murdered in a carjacking. He admits that his memories do not translate to facts and yet tell a true story of how he remembers them and how his search for meaning affected his growth during college.
Much of the first part of this memoir outlines Hsu’s search for Asian identity at Berkeley. He was continually searching to reinvent himself and rebrand his image through the music and films of the day. This aspect of his story contributed to many relatable passages since so many of us as youngsters marked time by the popular music that spoke to us. Of course, another universal development during young adulthood is the formation of friendships, defining friends, and engaging in meaningful conversations. When Hsu befriended Ken, he realized how comforting it was to have conversations with mutual understanding and satisfaction. They shared philosophical thoughts and discovered themselves through each other’s experiences.
When Ken is murdered, Hua Hsu holds onto the pain for many years. Although some of his feelings could be attributed to the typical stages of grief, for him, it was more than that and almost obsessive at times, defining too much of his being. Finally, while attending graduate school at Harvard, a counselor helped him define the importance of Ken’s death in his overall coming of age, and he put it in perspective. He promised to write about it someday, and this book is the result of that promise to himself.
The text is rich with lots of tidbits to consider in one’s own life. Some of my takeaways are:
-He and Ken had long conversations about culture and projecting different versions of themselves.
-Asian American stereotypes are often subtle yet pronounced
-Gifts, by their nature, lead to delayed reciprocity and strengthen relationships and bonds in a community
-Navigating the immigrant experience is essential when considering cultural mores.
-Intergenerational conflict is universal.
-What is History? by Edward Carr is a book that discusses the history, facts, the bias of historians.
